I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize