I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
you would pick up someone in the library
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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