Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
