wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
