look no pants
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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