Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
