who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I didn't notice because vodka
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
