I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
