i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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