why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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