Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
