dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
