the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
