it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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