I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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