The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
