5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
