You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
