do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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