are you so shy because you have an std?
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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