"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
My feet surprised me
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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