what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Randomize
