This is not my ceiling
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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