Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
