I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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