She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
