rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
