Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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