This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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