I wannas sexs uuuuu
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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