It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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