Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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