The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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