VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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