even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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