And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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