Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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