I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
