all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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