did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
