He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
