so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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