So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
