so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
