we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize