The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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