I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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