I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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