so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
