well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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