Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
